3 Ways to Make Contracts Inclusive for LGBTQ+
/Happy Pride 2020! 🏳🌈
If you know me, you know that I believe “love-is-love.”
All of our shop contracts are drafted using gender-neutral language, and written to avoid traditional assumptions and gendered roles (and re-evaluated every 12-18 months or so). BUT…… I don’t talk about that much, because I don’t like to feel like I’m patting myself on the back. I feel like that should just be how it is.
Buttttt that’s going to change today, because— as they say— “assumptions” make an “ass” out of ‘you” and “me.”
And I’ve spoken to some folks who had no idea their contracts— which are at their core an extension of the brand experience— are alienating and non-inclusive!
So let’s talk about making contracts INCLUSIVE to our LGBT+ friends!
Consider potential clients: Stop using “bride and groom.”
There are lots of great ways to describe two people getting married. “Couple” is one of them. “Client” is another, although it’s a little less warm-and-fuzzy. Using these terms are good for a few reasons:
You aren’t alienating same-sex couples/ non-cisgender couples by using gender-specific terms. This one’s a given. But I’ve got more up my sleeve for you practical folks.
“Couple” means the people getting married. It groups them together as one unit. If defined correctly, you can ensure that a “Couple” is “jointly and severally liable” for a contract, which means they are BOTH fully responsible for payment, BOTH covered by the model release, BOTH subject to restrictions or limitations, and BOTH bound to any other important terms. Why is this important? Check out this post where I delve into that big old WHY.
Practically speaking, it’s going to save you space in the contract. We like CLEAR, CONCISE LANGUAGE. “Couple” or “Client” is— practically speaking— much more efficient. The biggest request I hear is for simpler, shorter contracts. CUT DOWN YOUR WORD COUNT by using simpler language (and avoid unintentionally alienating clients at the same time)!.
Use “They” or “Them” instead of he/ she.
Consider friends and family: Don’t use “Bridesmaids” or “Groomsmen”
Again, we’re going to nix this “bride and groom” situation, because you may be serving an event without a bride or a groom.
But also consider that your clients may have gender-nonconforming individuals in their wedding. Or maybe their best friend is of the other gender. Maybe Whatever it is, let’s rock with “attendants” or “wedding party” instead. SIMPLE switch here!
Consider Parents: Ditch “Mother-of-the-Bride, Father-of-the-Bride, Mother-of-the-Groom,” and/ or “Father-of-the-Groom” language
Here’s another sneaky way these gender roles pop into our contracts: Mother/ Father of the Bride/ Groom. And this one is a double whammy.
By now, we know we need to ditch the Bride/ Groom language (see #1).
But also, some people don’t just have a mom and a dad. And consider: the case of LGBTQ+ clients, what if their parents are not supportive of their marriage?
By using Mother/ Father of the Bride/ Groom, you’re potentially making those folks uncomfortable or reminding them of painful family issues, and reinforcing traditional family stereotypes on them. Your clients may be looking for someone who will support a non-traditional family dynamic, or who they can trust to take care of their parents. They want to know you’re on their team!
Some alternatives?
Refer to them by their task, (“Day-of Emergency Contact”) or call them the “Point Person.” Usually, in a contract, we don’t need much more than that to describe another critical party.
BONUS: Also think about your clients who may have lost a parent. This language will also bring up emotional issues for the family they wish was there.
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LESSONS: we can do a LOT to make contracts more inclusive. It doesn’t take much time or effort to show potential clients that you are ready and excited to support their upcoming marriage!
Do you have any other recommendations?
Happy Pride, y’all. And don’t forget that Black Trans lives matter.♥🏳🌈
